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    There didn’t seem to be any point in accepting that I was gay if I didn’t have anyone to “be gay” with—gay friends, a boyfriend, a drag mother.

    Okay, I was actually terrified of drag queens back then, but now I can’t get enough.

    I had never met a gay person before in my life, at least not that I knew of.

    I was only vaguely aware that other people like me existed.

    One of the things not to say on a first date is "My father was a drunk," while Sullivan says men like to hear "Your butt is awesome," "I'm so proud of you" and "You make fabulous coffee." Sullivan's advice is more constructive when dealing with relationships: dating someone with a different HIV status; integrating your "inner teenager"; working through internalized homophobia; and suggested communication strategies for couples.

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    Right needs to possess; and locations for running into eligible men." But unfortunately for my ex as well as for all the other bisexual men and women out there, the straight and gay people who use a bisexual identity as a "halfway house" contribute to the widespread negative notion that anyone who identifies as bi is actually a flimsy, half-hearted gay man or lesbian.It's one reason why so many bisexuals — my ex included ­— feel so excluded from the LGBT movement.Yet, easier overall doesn’t always mean easier on an individual scale – and if you’ve been single a while it can be only too easy to view these tales of lasting love and marriage as some sort of urban relationship myth, meant only for the very handsome, the very rich or the very lucky.Indeed, it’s not always easy to find a long-term partner on the gay dating scene, particularly if you have a clear idea of what you want in a man.

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